I just peed in my kitchenbs sinlk. New low- maybe. am i embarrassed? Not in the least
the truckdriver in the lane next to me just looked down and motorboated in my direction.
we were making out and he got up to change his pants. I wonder what would happen if i took my shirt off.
you don't seem to understand just how much pasta i spilled on my bed last night.
My therapist is concerned about your alcoholism.
If you come, call before you come in. I'm tanning my balls. Enjoy that visual.
I want to meet new people and vomit on their things instead\n
Last time we had a party like that I woke up naked on the pool table with a chalk outline around me and a empty bottle of jager duct taped to my hand.
Yea. I'm excited about this party too
It's all coming back to me. I drank moonshine from a milk carton from a guy named tomohawk last night.
Is this one of those "if you didnt give such good head we couldn't be friends" moments?
Its 8 in the morning and I wouldn't pass a breathalyzer test, How's your day been?
I've sent two unsolicited tit pictures in less than 24 hours. I'm the female version of a fuckboy.
conclusion: canadians have really freaky sex
I accidentally just texted my dad asking if he wants to do shrooms with me. Do I leave the city now or...
He wanted me to do the rubix cube. He thought it was hot.
Randomize
