How bad was it?
You ran around telling everyone that you were going to click them to death on google earth
I would have added her but her profile pic was piece of pie
Why is the garage door in the middle of the street?
You basically tried to anal probe my passed out friend with a lamp
My dad got me a charm braclet....his way of trying to support my gayness....
I told him I'd go cook him breakfast, but ended up passing out on the kitchen floor in the fetal position spooning the dog
Sorry about all of the penis things that happened last night.
I have no idea. He was just running around wearing a horse mask yelling "bumfuck" repeatedly. We figured we'd just let him get it out of his system.
this could be the second dad I've smoked weed with
All I'm saying is that if you have time for a 20 min shower bj you have time for me
we played animal sounds and i linked arms with her cuz we were both cats....fate and my community college drama teacher have chosen my one night stand
Far be it from me to tell you where you store your dildos but from an interior decorating standpoint not fucking there
Lies! You took my virginity, and now my cigarettes!
You think that was bad? One time my parents found my sister half naked on top of the four runner in the garage. She makes me look like the good child.
I should have known it wouldn’t work. Someone saved in her phone as “Subway Sex” called the week before the wedding
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