he threw mangos from the tree he was in at people and got arrested for harassment
According to my dad, my tongue ring makes people assume I give a lot of blow jobs because, as stated by him "that's what it's for"
We had to be out of the dorms at 730. Meeting started at 8. I woke up at 948. Drunk and covered in glitter.
no one is going to fuck you in a field of bunnies
he actually used the line "do you have a map, because i'm lost in your eyes" and i was to drunk to care
at least 'blackout me' had enough sense to take the puke covered duvet off the comforter.
There was a guy running for some position in our government named "young boozer" hell yes I voted for him
I just took my birth control on the way to class with a 1/2 melted jello shot I happened to find in my purse from Friday night. I told you I was going hard this year.
Quick question. What's the protocol on going back to a bar after going home with one of their bartenders?
Go back and try to find another to go home with.
Just left the frat house in last nights clothes minus my earings, shoes, underware, tequilla cap, and my dignity. If you see me on your way home just hit me
Im making gravy in a lace bra and jeans. Just call me the southwern wet dream
It's times where you wake up in the hospital after trying to road surf that you wonder what you're doing in life.
he wouldnt let me in bed until i took off all the stickers i was covered in
We took three cabs to get home, the first one dropped us off a block away, so we went back to the hotel and tried again
eveytime i go to his house my cute clothes always get taken off what's the point of even wearing them there?
Randomize