So you honestly dont remember putting honey in your bong? You kept talking about how you wanted to become a bee and fly
you don't know how close you are to someone till they ask you to shave their ass.
And it was confirmed to me that I did in fact cut my girlfriend out of her dress with my sword.
You should know me better than that. I don't whore around. I promise this is a blowjobs only kind of trip.
Yeah I made some freshmen feed me oddles of noodles and I passed out
I don't know at which point last night turned terribly, terribly wrong, but it was somewhere around Motel 6, specifically the parking lot.
Do I like my job? I just bought 1/2 oz of pot from my supervisor at work. At a discount. And he said, "pay me whenever."
I woke up to the sound of him repeatedly tapping out SOS in Morse Code using his hard cock.
Remember that girl from my stats. class that I ran into at the bar 2 weeks ago? She literally hasn't been to class once since I told her I sit behind her.
Bro you fell face first into the sand and then balled up into the fetal position and yelled help untill I picked you up, no more whiskey for you...
I don't remember anything but bad decisions last night
All my female reproductive organs were screaming HELL YES last night.
Dude we just exchanged Zelda related pickup lines. I fell in love at "you can blow on my ocarina"
Nana added me on facebook...i think i'll have to call her and warn her about my lifestyle before i confirm her as a friend.
My body isnt used to all this fresh air, sun and booze....ok well maybe just the fresh air and sun...its used to the booze.
Randomize
