I need to buy a mesh tank top to fit in in Florida. Where do they even sell that shit?
I just had to take a drug test for my new job. I should have asked them if they could tell me if I were pregnant or not while they were at it and save me the guesswork.
worse. her friends hid in the bathroom while she gave me head and then screamed surprise right as i was about to cum
I was in holding with a guy that got a DUI on a hover round. He was so nice. We're hanging out tonight.
There was an awkward moment where I was going for his cock and he reach out and held my hand, thinking that what I was doing
So I vaguely remember making out with you this morning, I think you were on a date?
Fair warning: We've transformed the living room into a giant tent.
Apparently william has a "couch montage"...an album of facebook photos of himself on different couches in various states of happiness and despair. A heartwrenching journey through what was clearly a significant part of his life. I'd mock him more but I think the fact that I looked through it means he's already won
We found you in the middle of the road chucking gravel because "the house was too far away".
No, they seem attractive after SIX beers, after three they're just the gender you're looking for.
I found an inside smoking lounge. I'll be here for the next 4 hours. A nice old Canadian lady has befriended me and let me use her lighter. Fuck Hartsfield-Jackson AND this layover. I win.
I need a light and a towel. ive got cum in places ive never had cum before.
You slept on a pillow of digiorno
I forgot what I was gonna say, but I'm pretty excited to not be pregnant.
And when were you going to tell me to stop dancing on his coffee table singing "come on irene?"
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