Just saw a maroon grand am stop on my street, the driver opened the door, vomited, and then drove away like nothing happened. Been there, done that.
the man who designed bathrooms to have toilets within easy puking distance from the shower is my hero
In chronological order you drank, sang, smoked, napped, threw up, cried, laughed, described your pubic area, passed out. You have abused the privilege to use me as your D.D.
Let's discuss options later this evening. I'll draw out said options and compare and contrast the "accessibility" of the costume for quickies. Because you never know. Halloween is full of surprises. I'll also compare practicality, level of skank, and creative features.
SOS. HE HAS PASSED OUT AND IS LYING ON TOP OF ME. HE IS STILL INSIDE. HELP
Dude, we apparently put a washing machine drum in that back of your truck with the full intention of making a bonfire in it.
So wise, so handsome, so good at oral sex.
I appreciate alcohol much more now that I have to be sober sometimes
She was way too drunk so I dropped her off at her house and smoked a huge blunt with her mom.
I had sex in the back of a hot foreign guy with a lacoste eye patch's car
Never has jello made me angry to the point of drinking. But here I am.
My 1st STD. I feel like there should be a cake for this.
No one wants to start their day off with bloody lemons and a tampon in the toilet. Wtf.
i left you alone for two hours TWO HOURS & when i got back i had to rush you to the hospital because you were covered in Smooth Away pads & drinking the bong water..
We made out in front of everyone INCLUDING his girlfriend. And no one saw. THAT DRUNK!
Randomize
