There is a new fb quiz: "are you at ypical woman, future ex or from crazy town" - should i take it?
Aren't all three of those the same though?
so, i drunkenly called my religious roomie because i was lost and told her if she couldn't come find me, jesus would condemn her to hell for not leading me to the light .. too much?
We don't have a lot of plans besides weed and cake
Other than a hickey from some random Canadian roller derby girl, I came out unscathed
Judge me...This apron fits PERFECTLY when I have no clothes on
Who said I was judging? More like congratulating.
I think that the jello shots in bowls is where it all went wrong.
The kid across the hall found me in the hallway using a hot pocket box as a pillow. I said its okay I live here.
Excuse me while I download incredibly disturbing porn until I'm more ashamed of myself than of my country.
Look. When I let you cum on my tits don't fuck it all up by going "SKEET SKEET SKEET" it just pisses me off.
And I just want you to know I got myself into this mess. I gotta get myself out. Plus, don't you only need one kidney?
he looked at me and said 'happiness is a warm blanket' then stole my vodka.
Lack of response to this text gains you a half hour of freedom before I initiate operations to conclude you are not, in fact, comatose. You requested no mercy.
I just want you to know that i deffinately saw the baby clothes, and didn't freak out and still had sex with him. I'm going to hell.
Today will be the day I throw up in my backpack in the middle of class
Guess who won a basket of sex toys in front of his parents, aunts, uncles, sister, and cousin...
Randomize
