"Monday" is guna come over...
but its Thursday?
yeah, but she cant make it.Monday can...so there ya go
i just made my mom cry by blowing spit bubbles.
sorry about calling you the devil all night.
We agreed to not shave eyebrows when someone is passed out. douchebag.
Wow, nothing is more special than changing the channel and seeing the guy who groped you on Saturday night...
We ended not having sex. I didn't want to explain that I was wearing a Unitard because all my socks and underwear were dirty.
I have their Unicorn picture in my shirt, and I just threw a Bud Light Platinum bottle through their window. We need to go now.
His flight is delayed. Mother Nature is delaying me from sex.
It's been awhile, you pregnant yet?
My life has hit a new low, I just licked MDMA of someone's bed.
The dicks good but it's not two trains and a bus good.
IT'S LIKE LOOKING INTO GOD'S VAGINA!!!!
She handed me scissors and told me that they were the ones with the lowest probability of having been used to trim someone's pubes.
You use your abs way more than I realized. Btw multiple orgasms is the best thing I've ever discovered.
I found my bra I wore on Friday night...he fucked the underwire out of it
hahahahaha
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