I left the party when things started to get crazy... and when I say crazy I mean: there was puke on the carpet, Evan was passed out behind a plant, Mary was making out with her ex while her present bf was making out with Nancy. Not to mention that someone fisted the wall. Also - someone is sleeping on your lawn - they might be dead, I didn't check. Later.
i'm officially boycotting relationships. hello random hook ups and treating men like meat.
the sex was "jacking off to playboy" bad.
at least he left the skimmer on the side of the pool so i could fish out my thong in the morning
we've been doin it since '07. it's like married sex now, were both comfortable so neither of us really tries anymore, we just do it because it's convenient
the world took limewire and four lokos away from me in one week....hello depression
About to see some guy and give him a glance that tries to express how sorry i am for blowing his friend while he was getting a BJ in the same room
Not sure if it's my shorts, hat, shoes, hair or soul but one of the above just got me drunk again from the glorious aroma of Keystone Light.
Now I can't say for certain but I'm 90 percent are I bathed myself with dog shampoo last night
I was about to share my drunken story from the weekend, but two friends getting married and one finding out she's pregnant makes Saturday in jail look a little suspect.
Riding your boyfriend's dick for an hour then waitressing for 8 hours. Would not recommend.
My disapointment is making my balls hurt :(
I told him to take the baby so I could work out. My workout consisted of getting high and masturbating
Sooooo have your ex-girl console you over your ex ex girl that you destroyed said ex-girl over the possibility of
THE SUN DOESNT SET TIL 647 YAAAAASSSSSSSSSS. Goodbye seasonal depression hello regular depression
Randomize