we are driving next to a guy driving and masturbating while looking at a naked magazine. I love LA
the red, white, and blue power rangers were all also in the porn buisness, good bye childhood
I'm in the dining hall. that same guy is here again, the one who sits alone and talks to his silverware.
literally have a bruise on my forehead from being over the toilet all night.
Sorry for making you give strangers a ride for hits of acid.
Should I have a moral quandary about Skyping topless with him while his son slept in the other room?
She said she'd heard about my nickname in high school. Apparently sledgehammer isn't as popular as you'd believe...
He actually offered up a silent prayer thanking God for my "tremendous ass." You tell me how my night is going.
I literally just biked home like I was on the last leg about to win the tour du France. Fuck diarrhea
Fuck romance. Just shaved my nipples in the shower because I felt like it. That's the life I'm about.
I'm pretty sure his cum gave me swimmer's ear.
Jeff brought me a cup of coffee to my desk. He's getting a blow job.
Im so hungover I just threw up at the sight of a CARTOON CRABBY PATTY
I just made a dick pic collage. Let me just tell you,there is no comparison to the latest!
You were painting for six hours and managed one four foot wall. "The Mellow Handyman" isn't a good business model.
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