dude this 15 year old girl saw our youtube vid and just facebook messaged me saying i was verry verry pretty. i have no schemas for how to respond to this situation.
woah 15?
i know! what is this dateline?
we should start having sex in the shower. less clean up.
I wish orgasms lasted as long as the pain from rug burn
I feel like now would be a good time to apologize for vomiting in your eye
Quick question... Can I call you daddy? Or would that just really made the whole 8 year age gap a bigger deal...?
he congratulated me on my ability to grow long hair after pulling it to see if i had extensions
He expects to fuck my tits but will ignore me in public.
Someone left me hummas on my door step between the hours of 1am-3am
I am having the most awesome nonsexual conversation about my vagina right now
He didn't get how "starting a flash flood in my thunderhole" was a sexy euphemism. Deal breaker.
My poor liver. I drank enough on NYE to sustain an alcohol addiction for the entirety of 2015.
Your skill with memes is vaguely frightening
I was supposed to go on a date tonight but I cancelled because I found out the Lizzie McGuire movie is on Netflix.
i'm drinking soco out of a mickey mouse cup right now. i love it when college and my childhood meet in the middle.
he broke off the kiss to ask "can I grab your boob?" like props for asking for clear and concise consent but there HAS to be a sexier way to do it
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