tell her no need for introductions. and that you've read about her on the back of toilet doors.
david just texted me. reply with photo of genitalia? y/n
He looks like Spencer from the game Dreamphone
i want to find a way to basically assault his face with my vagina.
some bitch filled my sink with salsa.
Man, I thought my dick was gonna fall off.
Dude, I didn't even think they made slap bracelets anymore. You okay?
The fire alarm went off at 3 am in the freshmen dorm. So guess which junior everyone now knows is hooking up with a freshman? This girl...
History professor is at the bar. Hurry! There's only so many A's he could give before it starts to look bad.
Oh my god did you actually lose a tooth
He just showed up. He's like 5'8 and brought a beer pong table that has " I love gay boys" on it. How could this go wrong
What's the place called?
I searched "county" on google, but....there's a lot of results
you know it was a successful halloween when you wake up and have a firecracker in your tits
When campus security rolled up he stole their car and drove it like 100 feet. Then he walked up and gave back the keys because it was a hyundai.
ya well i woke up to my roommate spraying me with windex...
I have bruises everywhere an I broke the lamp. So ya I'd considerate rough sex.
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