what do you have against ST
DO NOT ABBREVIATE LIKE YOU AND STAR TREK ARE FRIENDS.
You can't motorboat a personality
I just spent all my babysitting money on red cups and beer.
People still let you watch their kids?
When sleeping with someone new: should you hide the magnum condoms, or let him know what he has to live up to?
Next year we will be 30 and no more shots during the week.
I literally saw him try to open a beer can with his anus. We need o step up our game.
You sat there for 20minutes trying to seduce the picture of my dad.
Look,the guy had sex w/a Canadian prison guard on the deck of a cruise ship,he could blow any second.
I mean, I already put pants on today. We're already halfway there
Her mom came in and passed out drunk on the floor next to us while she was riding me, "it's all good, she does this all the time" is what she said
Just want the two of you to know, I went to a golf tournament today. Respectable, expensive… Flipped the golf cart. Seriously, I'm 40. What the fuck?
tbh I think I just dated him for his dogs in the first place.
he's so sweet and its so cute. but I swear to fuck if I let my guard down and this was all a lie I am going to become a serial killer.
It's has to do with my genitals. Don't ask.
so after 3 days of looking i found the keg...looks like somebody tried burying behind the garage
Randomize
