Blackout barefoot maybe pregnant
Good decisions....
Just got blue box Mac and cheese things are looking up
If last night was a website it would be called poordecisions.com OR uncircumcisedspanishweiner.org
do you know why i have a volvo grill taped to the back of my car?
Awww. A guy on the train just took his coat off so his girlfriend could throw up into it. Who says chivalry is dead?
i yelled out "tuesday" during orgasim. he fucked me into 2 days from now.
Made a visit to my old puking stall. I missed it.
you can SEE the outline of a pad through her jeans. there is no way
I gave you a lap dance in a bowling alley... And I was Fine?
This is going to be one of those "I can only do this high" classes
WHO THE FUCK PEED IN MY BONG
When ur uncle gives you free weed, you take it
It's one am and you're asking me if you should buy a plane ticket for a booty call.
If you had asked me 10 years ago where I thought I'd be right now at 26 years old, I can bet you one million dollars that "tweezing out my nose hairs before I go in to get laser hair removal on my upper lip" would NOT have been the answer
I was cock-blocked by a swat team last night.
We free pour in this house. Measuring alcohol is for the weak
Randomize
