He promised he'd be the first bidder on my ebay item if i went home with him. Worth it.
Woke up with string cheese braided into my hair- literally braided
I went back up to the apartment to get her phone and when I came back she was peeing on the sidewalk
It was either the harsh truths I was divulging or the liquor..... But either way, I made mom puke
don't mind me. just hanging out in this cool air conditioned Babies R Us until the liquor store next door opens.
Just watched an entire Mariachi band walk of shame home together. Halloween at its finest
So i am officially handcuffed to the pole on the party bus while taking jello shots.....this shall be an interesting night
i woke up and found a picture of his grandma in my purse.. im a kelpto
My mom just told me my dad shaves his pubes while drunk and I don't know how to feel anymore.
I will sleep with anyone I have to to make sure you don't get deported
There is what appears to be urine on the woman's bathroom sink. I just have so many questions right now.
We got stuck in traffic in the tunnel while we were smoking weed. We were afraid to air out the car.
A guy I hooked up with YEARS ago just endorsed me on LinkedIn for "customer service".
My moral compass kept pointing to his penis.
I just shaved my legs via the sink as to not wake my parents up because I know I'll be having marathon sex tomorrow after my certification exam... so this is life after college.
Randomize
