im shaking like a drug addict and i almost just shat my pants when i sneezed...no more patron for me
Hannah Montana > iCarly
I'm disregarding that text and your testicles entirely
And i laid in the yard with carrots on my chest cause i wanted a bunny
dude stop sending me pictures of your dick in weird places. i get it. you rock out with your cock out.
id like to point out that while i was just peeing a condom fell out of my vag.
i feel like god sat there all night pointing and laughing at me
Still burping lighter fluid. Totally awful.
just an fyi, false alarm on the whole ghonnorea thing. you're safe.
Thank god Shes going home for winter break, gives my dick a chance to recover from those "bjs." Youd think a senior could suck a dick by now.
It's just good to know that when I drink like a twenty year old I still act like one.
Btw: some husbands are not impressed by me trying to snap photos of their wives camel toe.
All's fair in love and war. and tinder.
We might as well just set our livers out to sea on burning ships
Spent tonight painting strippers in camo.
While the cops were busting my party one of them said. O you have an Xbox? Do you play online? Whats your gamertag?....
Randomize
