we went to a bar last night, drank beer in plastic cups. I took pics w/a random kid i pulled into a photobooth & i have easy mac in my purse. I belong here.
Blackberries need to come with a feature that disables texting to certain numbers after 2am based on content. liek disabling texting to 'dad' containng the words 'lets try to find more blow.'
she was left over bi-product, like the hotdog of the human race
Best moment of my life. I just got a text from some random number that said i can't wait to touch you. Her name is kiara and she had the wrong number.
I'm such a slut...i kept having sex with him after he called me his ex gf's name. I just felt like i deserved something out of it too.
and then you went into taco bell without pants...and surprisingly you weren't the only one there without pants
no. i just ate a whole thing of hot dogs. me and regret are sleepng alone tonigh.
you started looking at my couch laughing and saying to it "she thinks I'm talking to you" then proceeded to laugh and talk to the couch some more.
You made out with a guy who refers to his cock as "rafiki." Are you proud of yourself?
You were force feeding yourself jello and you kept repeating, "I will not surrender"
Ugh..Yesterday was a complete alcohol fueled shit show. Not making eye contact with anyone today. Don't deserve it. Eye contact is for decent people.
Great sex, the promise of us mixing our excellent genetics in the future, and access to drugs are mainly what's holding this relationship together at the moment
Couldn't finish, so she gave me "the tap," and I had to leave the mound early. Nothing worse than the long walk back after the manager comes out and asks for the ball.
The first crop top of the year and you're rocking it in the ER. #ratchet
What is my life?
Alas my dad DD'd me. Legit cock blocked to the highest degree
Randomize
