Sweetheart, you've always been a horrid bitch...
we got a new version of the plan b at the pharmacy now. its called next choice. you would think they would come up with better names for these things.
is it bad that the only reason i knew what antidote meant in class today, was from years of playing pokemon?
Dude, the women on the view have some valid arguments
You know how I know you're gay?
Dude Eric's high and buying everyone taquitos. How much room do we have in the freezer?
I'm glad we are bonding over both contracting clamidya. Winners.
100%
You went home with a man in a loincloth
I just watched him leave in half a loincloth. Don't you just love Halloween???
I used a jello pudding cup as a shot chaser last night. I'm the Bill Cosby of alcoholics
Her vagina was like a painting you can put your face in.
Sure. But we have to be quiet.
Ninja mode activated
I am still awake. And let me sing you the song of my people. Ahem. "I have a bottle of hydrocodone and you all can fuck off."
The dysfunction is strong in this one.
I'm naked on my couch and just ate a chip that was in my belly button.. my 20s have been weird.
idk how many shots you took between 2:39 and 3:05, but your message went from "Please text me tomorrow." to "Why you sto textom?"
she's always on high-alert for lesbians
Randomize
