I'm on page 4.
Im on beer infinity
Totally just grabbed the wrong dick. Damn this tequila.
I only wish the guy being lead around by his cock at the drag show was the weirdest part of my night.
He managed to scream "cowabunga bitch" before he went down on me. Let me know if you still like him.
oh dear god, that would be like watching to female walruses mate. We need to stop going to that lesbian bar...
Well. No wine. And no real mixers. I'm using vodka and grape juice and calling it Slurrrlot. Happy Holidays bitch.
i passed out twice in the shower, twice on the bathroom floor, once holding the toilet bowl and 8 times moving from the bathroom to my bed. Tequila sucks.
it was also funny because at one point I woke up with my hands tied with a belt and we were both like what the fuck
Stop studying come to the bar get drunk and help me figure out how to get home pretend there are commas in there someplace
After this week, alcohol is mandatory.
I finally broke my dry spell. I did it. D-do-da-Dora.
You could totally spank that new found Catholicism out of him.
If wanting to text you my feelings after three mojitos is wrong I don't wanna be right.
I have mystery bruises on my right knee, right arm, under my chin, and on my forehead. What the fuck happened last night??
I should not have moved in with him. He's got porn stashed everywhere like a homosexual squirrel.
You love porn!
Not in the sugar bowl when I'm making my Mom coffee I don't.
Randomize
