Is it bad that everytime I read or hear "Woo Hoo" I immediately think of sex because of The Sims?
He has that cheese in a can and he's eating it. I have never seen that outside a goofy movie.
Stop blaming waffle house for all your problems
Improvement. She went from pretending she was the soccer ball in the world cup games and it hurt when they kicked her to passed out on the floor.
I woke up naked in my bathtub at 5:30 this morning. There's legit a spray tan body print of me in the fetal position in my tub.
I'll even be awesome and bring pizza for your family, just as a "hey thanks for letting a stranger get trashed at your house" gesture.
Its a sick, sad, world when parents get more ass then you.
How do we stop her downward spiral?
Wine. For us.
His cat kept scratching my feet while we were having sex. There's only room for one pussy around here. It also concerns me that he owns a cat.
Mmm. Champagne. Weed. 17 pounds of animal crackers.
After an orgasm, I always feel the urge to sing A Whole New World from the move Aladdin and I'm not quite sure why.
My cat is watching me play with my new vibrator
He flipped me around so that we could have sex and both watch Die Hard... I think I found my sole mate. Merry Christmas to me!!🎄
it wasnt that bad
you tried to climb into my fireplace while screaming TO DIAGON ALLEY! we didnt even watch harry potter. it was bad
This toilet bowl is my home.
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