After he came all over my face, he proceeded to give me a high five. I can't even act upset because I always put myself in these situations. Did I mention D3: Mighty Ducks was playing in the background?
careful when you do the walk of shame, they are handing out bibles on campus
just fyi, hangover + ice skates = really bad idea
At one point in time, he cried and said I didn't appreciate him.
That big chick who gave you the handly polished off one of the walls to the ginger bread house right before she came outside. FYI
I just tripped out to the Angel of Music from Phantom of the Opera in my car. Wayyyy to high for shuffle right now.
Anxiously awaiting my period drinking Hershey's syrup from the bottle. Don't judge me
An image of us stuck like that like Pompeii comes to mind. A wonder for future anthropologists
this dude, we had a connection. he kept smiling at me. it's like he knew i was gonna facebook stalk the fuck out of him
AND WHAT FELONIES DID I MISS OUT ON WHILE SLUMBERING!?
I had my room mate call my phone after last night and it was in an uncooked quesadilla
I made a nest in his bed. I'm not leaving
I just realized how terrible that was... I was drumming on your penis to a song about Baby Jesus.
I woke up completely naked in a mint condition 71 chevelle in someones garage. What.
Consume your own penis you ugly freak.
Randomize
