How long do you think herpes can live on chapstick?
My social work teacher just told our class about her bicurios adventures in college
is she hot?
She is now
I found a girl on our couch wearing lederhosen this mornig... I dont know if i should be impressed or ashamed
All I want to do right now is burp, puke, and fart. In that order.
I even resorted to pole dancing with the street sign. I have an extra $20 now because I think people were paying me to leave.
Just sold a bike on craig's list for 4 four lokos and a 40. How bad do you miss college?
In need of cum proof mascara. Don't judge me.
So burnt out. Like weed hangover. And someone just fell through the ceiling outside of my class. How's your morning going?
Because you stood over the Ice luge screaming STONE COLD and poured beer on everyone
HEY. NO. THIS IS ABOUT YOU RIGHT NOW. YOUR COCK, MY MOUTH, THATS IT.
We just stood outside and debated the existence of mermaids for about 20 min. Is this what too drunk is?
He literally said from now on he's always banging chicks with asthma becuas it's such an ego booster
No, I'm not a weirdo, I keep bondage straps under my matress like a normal person, not a diary.
Sustenance and doggy style.. the only two things I need
Just bought 2 liters of wine and frozen waffles for dinner. Is this 30?
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