Get condoms and clear your schedule for the night. I'm bringing chinese food!
I've officially moved beyond college drinking. I just got business drunk at an internship seminar.
vagina is talking i cant
he had his head down and said he was listening for the buffalo, he had to still be drunk.
Do you think it would be a good idea to mention in my admissions essay that I was the guy that streaked across the soccer field last year?
Buying weed with grant money. God I love college. No other time are we presented with these opportunities.
He said he doesnt believe in the female orgasm,so no I did not have sex with him.
Beans, may the odds of a nip slip and drunken make out session be ever in your favor
Is it okay to thank someone for the orgasms they gave you, even though they weren't with you?
my ex's current girlfriend held my hair as I threw up. new low.
Uhmm, it's called hentai.
I DON'T CARE WHAT IT'S CALLED I DON'T WANT TO SEE IT ON MY WORK COMPUTER
Took my plan b at Costco today, sample Sunday for the win.
Pretty sure the delivery guy saw me taking a shit this morning
He took me out to dinner to tell me we had to stop fucking so randomly
Honestly wish he pleased me as much as queso does
Started dabbing in blow again because he always hated that I did it. Yuh I’m doing drugs but at least I’m doing me?
Randomize
