He better hope I dont die soon. Because I would haunt his bitch ass and cock block 24/7
Watching NYC prep. Doing a shot everytime one of these d-bags flips his hair. I give it 10 minutes before alcohol poisoning set in.
and all i could think was, am i really about to have sex with someone who still thinks that pee comes out of the actual vagina?
hey sry I lost all my numbers who is this?
pat the guy you slept with
still need a last name
i wish i was a boy too so i knew what a blow job felt like
I am growing concerned with the number of people here in cowboy hats
Oh god the guy I took underwear from at the bar is trying to add me as a friend on facebook now.
Sweet. Warning: i have been drinking at work since 4. Plan accordingly.
Want to know what makes for a better story than treehouse sex? Getting busted during treehouse sex
Yeah, I only wore tennis shoes under the gown. Way cooler than khakis and a shirt, but much more awkward when my parents wanted to go to dinner immediately after the ceremony and my grandmother started to unzip the gown. Stopped her before it was too late, but barely. My dad just rolled his eyes.
Young lesbians are the worst. And also what got me through high school, sooooo
We took vodka shots. You kept saying it was the key to your heart.
I wonder how drunk we can get before Christmas Caroling turns into trespassing.
Oh. My. God. I. Am. Going. To. Punch. Someone. In. The. Face. Immediately.
He gave his liver a pep talk before the vodka chugging started
Randomize
