I painted my nails silver
And what are the implications of that?
Is there supposed to be a msg in that? Just thought ud like to know it looks like I fingerbanged an alien
Apparently we had sex last night, and then I made him drive me to the beach so I could puke in the ocean.
Responsibility does not care about your dick.
You seriously looked at the house acorss the street and implied that you thought they had nice Easters.
it was either that or behind a dumpster, and i am way too pretty to pee behind a dumpster
look up what dreaming that you're in a lesbian relationship with a manatee means.
He picked me up went to throw me on his bed. I landed on the wood frame. That's how I broke my rib. We still fucked. Thanks tequila. Best injury ever
You made a course evaluation for your vagina? Wow. You really are a professor now.
How can I politely yet provocatively ask you for a cock shot?
I am so horny that I an legitimately concerned for your safety when I see you tonight.
Wanna go get tea? Warning: I will be high in an hour.
So who has the penis shaped party tray? You or your mom?
I knew she was the one when we had sex to the halo soundtrack.
I'm so gassy and it's your fault.
I’m making a jello mold of my penis
Will it be as disappointing as your actual penis?
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