You guys sftrill at mcdondalds?!!!!
Yes.
fuckin bring me a cheseburgeria
i think the next time he gets me off i'm going to scream bangarang
ru fi oooo
I called him Han Solo during sex, he looked at me like he was mortified then I realized he came.
if you were to get worldwide popularity from playing guitar with a plastic yellow bat while drunk on YouTube, would you hate me?
Walk-of-shaming home in that dress you got arrested in. Six guys called out your name when I walked past. I've never been more proud of us.
you don't know true fear until you are a convinced that velociraptors are trying to kill you through your roof.
PS: I just woke up from my shower
THIS IS NOT A DECISION I MADE AT ONE IN THE MORNING IM JUST GETTING AROUND TO TELLING YOU ABOUT IT NOW
You made out with him a lot. Almost as much as you told everyone Paul was the zamboni guy.
It was good. Ended up having a 3 hr make out session with her
What is this high school
There was a lot of catching up to do bro
There's nothing more awkward than going on a beer run with 3 ten year olds....teacher of the year right here!
My parents are paying for my knee surgery for my birthday. What costume will look good on crutches for my Halloween Birthday?
Welcome to adulthood.
I just stole a bunch of balloons from a birthday party and am giving one to each person at the bar.
I miss my bedroom and my bed and being able to spray myself with my choice of 15 different perfumes so I don't have to wake up to the smell of my past sins
he was Irish, I had to have sex with him.
Randomize
