Food network will be on but we won't be watching
O by "watching" I mean "background noise"
the doormen always congratulate him in spanish as he walks me downstairs in the morning
he is a creepy guy.
yea thats what heroine does to ppl.
I'm still in shock that he came by my house for five minutes dropped off a Teddy bear and went to the strip club on valentines day
last karaoke night = doing dmx songs with a guy who threatened to stab me. so yeah I'm coming out.
I think I'm still drunk and I think you were in my dream (sadly, it was not a sexual bill murray one).
I just listened to "Eye of the Tiger" and did 5 shots to prep going over to see him.
I just wanted to warn you I have strep throat incase I gave it to that guy we both hooked up with on New Years.
I told him to just roll me a blunt and put it in a heart shaped box.
Ask her if it hurt when she broke through earths crust as she ascended from hell
im far more worried about your salsa intake than your weed intake
If my vagina was a person it would have a bandage around its head and it's arm in a sling rn
is it still the walk of shame if his dad gave me a 'thanks for sleeping with my son' head nod on my way out this morning?
I came twice and when I was done I petted his head and said "you did good kid you did good" and just laid back smiling. Tell me I'm not awesome.
The police officer that arrested me Friday night just bought me a shot
Randomize
