honestly if we didnt hate the same people we would have a friendship based on nothing
I am one bad relationship away from having 30 cats.
You say "I'm in class" like it matters... I'm getting a little tired of having to smoke by myself at 4:20 because you're in class.
I just got hit on by my highschool french teacher. I need to stop going to this bar.
All we did was argue about ponys and drug dealers
she left around the point i tried to tie her hair around my dick
What's standard gratutity for someone having a miscarriage on stage at a strip club? It's important.
I would think I was a stalker too if I wasn't myself
We all make mistakes. Just lock them up deep down inside your mind so they can surface as weird sexual fantasies it takes your therapist years to decipher when your 40
No you don't understand. This tree is really alive. Like in Pocahontas.
Look, I tried but his dick tasted like disappointment.
My mom heard me having sex with my boyfriend but thought it was the neighbors. She commented on how quick it was. I just nodded and changed the subject
I just motorbotted some guy and my hair got stuck in his nipple ring...owww
right after that u started calling me g-force and started trying to bellyslide down his drive way
I promise it wsnt a penis when i put it in my mouth
Randomize
