Make me a promise>>> if you ever see the brats from that tv show NYC Prep walking around, you will trip them, and you wil throw drinks on them
It took me 40.8 seconds to take a dump at her house, I know because I timed myself.
only 75% of american men are circumcised...i guess this was bound to happen to me someday.
and all i could think about was how mcdonalds would not be open anymore after we were done having sex
Is it bad that we're talking like nothing happened?
Ah. Blossoming love after wild blackout drunk sex.
I know I'm her Sunday school teacher. I just feel I would be saving others from a lot of headaches by telling her someday she's going to be a stripper
Why have they been driving around the block for the past 30 min?
He told her it was international road head day.
Why must everything this weekend have to do with something going into or coming out of my vagina?
It's Been clinically proven that people who have sex 6 or more times per week are happier than those who don't. Just and FYI. For your mental health. From a soon so be psychologist. Who is drunk.
One of the annoying girls in my 7 AM class showed up drunk for her 21st birthday and just auctioned off her fake ID.
Boobs have been pretty central in my life somehow lately which makes me question if I am truly gay
Was your bare penis on or around my blanket?
I named my Roomba after my pot dealer. I have a problem, don't i?
I have got to stop telling people I was almost a prositute every time I drink
He lit my hand on fire and bought me chicken nuggets. I'm in love.
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