I would like to thank collapsed soviet republics and fathers who didnt show enough attention for tonight's festivities
they had a keg party to fund her abortion.
We were in the backseat and he was giggling uncontrolably. It felt like I was giving head to a 10 year old girl.
well most of my day revolves around power hour
There's two big trays of water in our freezer. I just hope they freeze by Saturday. for the ice luge.
its Wednesday...
they're reeeeeally big trays
I'm stranded in the Hampton area. Looks like I'm going to have to take one for the team and pass out by this applebees.
sick fucks of a feather flock together
Pretty sure my body is in shock, I shouldn't feel this ok after last nite.
Some older looking guy gave me his card as he exited the train. Hes a pharmaceutical rep. I'm debating asking him for a job. Obv he wants sex but if I can get a job out of this maybe I can offer him more than a cheap dry handjob bc that's all I'm really up for these days
had a dream you helped me fill my shoes with yogurt. we were even like "why didn't we think of this before?!" like it was just so obvious
that sounds like something we'd do... we're onto something here
He offered me my choice of the Abe Lincoln or Ben Franklin dick pic.
No we didn't fuck. He picked me up I asked where we were going and he said "I don't know if you've ever heard of a little place called Denny's?" He was completely serious. I told him to stop the car and I got out and called Jack.
I know its 2 in the morning and everything. But i just straight up yelled "DON'T YOU UNDERSTAND THIS WORLD IS DIFFICULT ENOUGH AS IT IS WITHOUT YOU PULLING THIS BULLSHIT ON ME" to my taco. Because it fell apart on me. I think i might be cracking under this finals pressure.
The wedding is over. Operation sleep with my step-sister has officially begun
and eventually we just all took our pants off
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