do you remember wearing her cheetah rainboots and making bacon shirtless?
Its like they don't get that I only talk to them before homecoming, thanksgiving, or any other time I go home. I love highschool girls.
Kegger tonight. 10pm. $5 coverfor unlimited booze. Proceeds benefit nuns from Uganda. Bring friends. No shit.
you told that cab driver that when the 3 of us come togehter it means happiness and love
The number of people who end up getting laid as a result of the cha cha slide....is terrible.
Strip mythology. Everyone wins. Most of all me.
I don't know. She kept pirouetting across the kitchen while making dinner. I just sat there stoned.
I am on top of a rooftop peeing on your freedom
At least you didn’t announce to an entire bar you’ve eaten pussy, and then knocked your beer over.
like don't tell me my baby smooth vag offended you
I love you man but my hope is that you will not wake me up again by pissing on me
I'm surprised this is your first encounter with pepper spray. surprised, and somewhat proud.
Dude \nSo embarrassed \nJust sent a snap to my boss john and noticed my vibrator was right beside me
i woke up this morning from the best one night stand. i made the guy mickey mouse pancakes for breakfast and when i walked back into the bedroom he said "marry me"
I think I'm the first girl to break a bed with a guy, without even having sex with him while doing so.
Randomize
