did you ever find your cell phone? and your dignity?
I give out O-faces like they're halloween candy
she asked if she could keep her bee antennas on during her mugshot. i love halloween.
This frat boy drinking a forty and wearing a pussy patrol shirt just ran out in front of my car. I should have used less brakes.
Shut up. It sucks being the ugly friend, I would know, but someones gotta play the role
you called your neighbor "slutsauce" then passed out on the stairway. not even sure why, but props to you.
when im done with her im going to need you to carry me on your shoulders as i poses victoriously for all those who were within earshot
That's the ultimate walk-of-shame: running away from your own apartment and hiding in a McDonald's.
That's one good thing about being an only child. I can masturbate wherever the fuck I want
Is that a question you really want to ask or do you just want to tell you that I can't walk without feeling like my legs are collapsing underneath me
I don't know what's worse the fact that I woke up with a clit piercing or the fact that I didn't pay for it.
THEN YOU WILL NOT GET TO SEE MY TITS TONIGHT OR IN THE NEAR FUTURE YOU HEARTLESS BASTARD
I literally have a pirate chest of slutty clothing.
Looking back at our past texts, the minute it turned 2020 you were cleaning your house and I was dying of the cold. We were prophesying the Rona.
The thought of you trying to procreat frightenes and disgusts me!
Randomize
