"Monday" is guna come over...
but its Thursday?
yeah, but she cant make it.Monday can...so there ya go
i'm sorry if your life is a sore subject
Never eat 3 McGriddles and drink a carton of milk. It's like you're successfully killing self but you're alive.
I saw your arrest video on youtube. you look so thin!
3 a.m. laundry plus 100 proof peppermint schnapps does not turn out well. Not only is there a puddle of detergent outside the laundry room that I spilled, but my clothes were found in the dryer wit a box of Franzia and a 40. Good thing I was too drunk to turn it on.
He gave me a card that said "I'm so glad we found each other... In the pants" and a pat on the head... My walk of Shame wasn't so bad.
The struggles of a small town man whore
He called me Kitten either just because or he figured out my old s&m life. Either way huge turn on.
Open the door and I will lure them out to freedom with viagra and candy orange slices. You know they love that shit.
I have booze and I wanna give you a bj. How can you be mad at me?
Our house drank 90 beers yesterday afternoon before 8pm so add that to the list
I'm like a saiyan, every time I get trashed I come back stronger
Threw up on break at work. That brings our collective tally to 9 times. We can never drink like that on a monday again
I find nice boys who are in extremely long term relationships with nice girls, wait for them to break up, and sneak in for the rebound fucking.
You are like a terrifying jaguar of sex. Predatory.
tonight's safe word is brought to you by the phrase "Ahhhhhh"
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