i dont know what it is, i just found it in my pants.
Looks like an M-80 went off in a lb. of pastrami
the young, male pastor of my church has a jesus fish tramp-stamp. I made him show me.
Sober January is a disaster.
I even resorted to pole dancing with the street sign. I have an extra $20 now because I think people were paying me to leave.
I drew a venn diagram at the top of my final comparing stuff i know and stuff on the test.
yes we did fuck in his chapter room. yes it was demeaning. and yes, they probably will discuss it at chapter tonight.
she has a fucking refrigerator full of four loko and is charging 15 dollars a can.... she is like a mini donald trump
Just wondering did you put mouse traps and brownies on my porch?
She pulled a wad of lint out of my bellybutton while she was blowing me. Said she's never seen anything like it. I've never gone soft so fast.
Now you have tequila AND fuzzy slippers. Fuck you. I want that to be MY night.
The creepiest man is serenading me at the bar right now. I had about a quarter of a drink left and the bartender just walked over and filled it with vodka and walked away laughing.
I'm happily sitting on the toilet cause I'm too tired to move. I'm considering making this my permanent residence. It has a lot to offer.
Yeah, so if you ever try to steal it, just know my tongue's been on it in several occasions. All over it.
The guy next to me on the bus has one hole in his jeans that has over 20 mini dicks drawn on his leg. Classic.
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