We made it safely. Thanks for the call though.
Great. Don't do shady things like that ok?
But he was like 75 and lives right near mom and dad. Not a threat at all.
so im in the parking lot of taco bell eating a taco...and some girl just got out of a car and screamed at the top of her lungs "XANEX FOR SALE!!!!" i fucking love Hamilton.
whats a more ladylike way to say "fuck me on your lunch break"?
Yes, I am watching The Hills Have Thighs. And yes it is a porno remake of The Hills Have Eyes. And, again, yes, lesbian sex in the desert. Get the sand out.
i normally make it a rule to leave when white people start rapping... but they had blow.
I just fell down my stairs. I know that you are 6 hours away but please come pick me up. I promise I will still be here on the stairs.
u r missing out we r watching a tranny direct traffic in a gstring
Never ever ever ever ever ever give your number to a 30 year old at buffalo wild wings. Ever ever ever.
How am I supposed to stop smoking pot when girl scout cookies are being sold.
I screamed so bad because I thought he was going for my sandwich forgetting it was in my hand
this hospital has no fireball
I think I'm destined to be the stoner version of one of those successful but emotionally unavailable characters Sandra Bullock always plays in movies
If you feel frisky later I have a cowboy hat that would look great on you naked...
Who is this......
FYI bail money is still in my drawer. I know you have no car but you need to know this for tomorrow.
The wine is franzia the food is cheese puffs there is a canoe full of beer and the andre glasses are mason jars glued to candle sticks. i shit you not. Best. Wedding. Ever.
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