brad dismisses pussy with prejudice
The human being growing inside of her was a mistake. Lets just hope the boyfriend isn't.
It was the single greastest thing to happen to my dick ever
She's holding my hand. I'm going to kill myself.
I just found a pubic hair on my dick that wasn't mine.
I think your going to be the cause of an awesome death
No exaggeration. At the gas station she handed me the mop from over the counter and told me that's my last drink of the night
there's still three solo cups of your puke in my basement. so that needs to be solved at some point.
All i remember is you yelling at a stop sign and the rest is a blur
yo knit me an eyepatch. but also make it usable as a thong
The friend zone. He put me in the friend zone. But said he still wants me to suck his dick. I'm in the dick sucking friend zone and I want to die.
He got me off while watching hockey. He's a keeper.
Sometimes, being an adult means buying a bottle of whiskey after work and live tweeting the commercial breaks on food network.
Either it didn’t do much damage or I’ve lost all feeling in my asshole
The kid with the ed hardy shirt put a bunch of random shit in the washer and turned it on. example: a hanger, the movie Chocolate with Johnny Depp, and your mom's cat
Randomize
