I wanna eat
then frost
then eat your cupcake
I jusy said out loud "gingers unite in the middle of the night"
i really wanted you to get laid last night and i didnt think you were going to. so i posted porn on your facebook.it made sense at 3am
is not sure whether or not everyone at the club last night calling me a-easy is a good thing?
Just got back from my 9:00 am class to find my roommate soaking her lifesaver gummies in vodka so she can have them for a snack in class later.
Just think, if your stepsister would've gotten knocked up 2 years earlier, she could've had a TV show. What a bitch.
New handbag passed the ultimate test. The walk of shame. I had a bra, tights, skirt, shirt & sweater in it and you couldn't tell. yessss.
You sprayed lysol all over me. You said that my soberness was infecting your night.
That's just weird. That doesn't make sense sexually at all. I mean, you might as well tape a pen to the tip and try and write your name while you're at it.
Judging by your snapchat you're totally working on your project and definitely not singing, "The Sign" while shirtless with another man.
You were a hurricane of blowjobs and glitter makeup. You came out of the closet and took the house down with it
And if you put this on Facebook, I will drop live cockroaches in your mouth while you sleep and then smother you with a pillow.
You always say the most romantic things
Idk... he wears anklets.. i dont think i can get past that.
Is there such thing as dick sucking teeth guards?
I felt like a slutty ass cruella devil driving your old car, And I got in a fight with your wipers
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