Passed out on a playground for a while before trying to break into the elementary school. Erica thought her captain tasted like cat food, so she poured her bottle into her cat's dish and proceeded to eat it like cereal.
You win. Erica always eats cat food.
So the guy sitting next to me is watching dungeons and dragons on youtube. I didnt realize you could get more pathetic than actually playing the game.
you told me heaven would be the 3 of us at Moe's forever and every hot girl that walked in would ask us to play stone face
vagina is talking i cant
Motor boating, judging by the amount of lipstick I found I would say between 6 to 8 times
I'm listening to bach and watching porn,is that a sign of depression?
Quite the contrary. Sophistication.
I HAVE A BLACK EYE FROM A DILDO!! IM GETTING MARRIED TOMORROW! THIS IS NOT A MISSUNDERSTANDING!
Would you be mad if I just used the argument "I'm allowed to say that, my best friend is a lesbian"?
Never. I'm proud to help you win arguments.
But you're the one who should be jamming foreign objects into my vaj instead of an old weird lady. I mean, it is your birthday....
IT'S A FUCKING GIANT POKEBALL MAD OUT OF TINY ROSES
Apparently it's bring your ugly annoying ass piece of shit slob of a baby day at work
He says we're "annoying" but that's an odd word to describe a couple of heroic liquor saiyans
This is gonna be the kind of weekend where if it involves putting on pants, it ain't happening.
The reason why I poison my organs is so that you guys can't sell them.
I'm getting reacquainted with drunk me. She has grown up a lot.
Randomize
