dude, that girl smelled worse than the great depression.
hell yes lets make some ravioli
I wish I could drop acid with the muppets
I woke up with my left arm looking like it got mauled by a lion. Oo and she said someone broke her car window.
Just realized these events may be related.
We have a guy passed out in the bathroom with one of our pots. Not sure if he's your friend so I let him be
New Halloween costume idea: Frankenstorm. We have three hours. Make it work.
Hey you remember last Super Bowl when I sent you a pic of my testicles? Memories...
Also.. The Hobbit does not look like a cartoon. We were just too fucking high.
I feel like satan and death had a baby that took a shit that replaced my brain.
because. if I can't sit outside naked and eat my watermelon every morning then I really don't see the point in moving in with you.
And why in he fuck did I get 'dick' in Romanian tattooed on my forearm
ok but bondage is pretty much my easy mode
i came so much i feel like i were to try again, only dust would come out. and maybe glitter
they just got in argument over who had more of your dick pics. quit sending shit to my sisters fucker
I have mystery bruises on my right knee, right arm, under my chin, and on my forehead. What the fuck happened last night??
Randomize
