lol earlier she was acting like a normal gf... and then BANG! shes touching herself again...
Found her laying down in a booth in iHop. She's a keeper.
we need to find that guy that whips out his cock at the bar again
Talking about the game in the closet with a banana wearing sunglasses.
Don't. You get on the 18 year old. I'll get on the 38 year old. Together we will bridge 2 decades of cock.
FALSE ALARM! I didn't piss myself, I fell asleep in the shower and then drunkingly crawled into my bed
Just watched an entire Mariachi band walk of shame home together. Halloween at its finest
I just want to have normal problems like what kind of puppy to get, or should I pay a hooker to fuck Scott, or even a dilemma about fucking Twizzlers. I don't know.
Please come quick there are people in suits here judging me
She asked the bartender for "7 shots of something fruity" and long story short the bartender punched me in the face. Chivalry is stupid.
You know it was one hell of a night when you need to use your own thong to wipe cum off your face.
Which president had the biggest dick?
Take your time, I'll wait
I don't WANT a sex disease! Especially one assigned to me by my supervisor..
She woke up next me in bed and told me to stop driving so fast.
In other news I was masturbating last night and came really fucking hard to the thought of yelling at a customer....
Randomize
