Just fell off a train. Bad.
Good face, no body. And apparently her vagina is related to chewbaca.
Do you remember when I jumped into your arms and you farted?
Just turned rock'em sock'em robots with my little cousin into a drinking game. Im drinking bourbon hes drinking hot chocolate.
I had a terrible day! The only thing that makes me feel better is knowing Jack Bauers day was worse.
Seriously. My exes act like they own shares of my vagina.
Well, in their defense, they have invested a lot of time and money
she just came into my room, drunkenly shoved six dollars into my bra and told me to spend it on chicken wings.
I'm kind of concerned that there are now two different videos of me with knives
You said your face felt like it was made out out of boxes and kept asking me to give you a bath.
I couldn't find my shirt this morning so I stole one from his eight year old sister. Slutted up my outfit quite a bit.
I think we've entered a low point in our relationship when I'm sending you pictures of pubic hair designs "because they're funny"
Literally every boy I've dated is now in a somewhat successful band. My vagina has obviously been blessed by the rock gods.
I'm at a first year old's birthday party and a midget dressed as a cop just showed up. Word is we're going to toss and bowl with him. Updates to come.
At least your vagina gets to vagina again. Dust that thing off.
This toilet bowl is my home.
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