So she puts out... but it wasn't worth it
it doesn't mae me god, the fact that I am god makes getting dressed futile and tedious... btw i am still drunk
i wish i could tell you the night didnt begin with me drinking alone
Just did ten shots in 8.34 minutes........ Slowly getting over the loss
So basically he tried to get out of the car and crawl on the highway with the broken leg because he didn't want to go to the hospital. It was not a good time...then we got pizza though.
I'm still tasting pancake mix. I think this may actually be a serious medical problem...
I still love him regardless of his misguided forays into heterosexuality
At one point last night I over heard you say " I'm gonna puke in a bag and pour it down your throat" I LOVE YOU.
I want to get so drunk, you will need subtitles to understand me. Rough week.
im so hung over everytime my dog barks the sound vibration makes my whole body hurt
He somehow pantsed the bouncer and tipped him over before cartwheeling and skipping away? Help me find him.
You went into the shower with my roommate and cursed him out asking why he was there
Apparently mr clean magic erasers don't clean blood off the ceiling
It's like Jesus got stoned and this would be the sandwiches he'd make
This toilet bowl is my home.
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