Soo....this goes on the list of odd coincidences. My gyno calls me while I'm going at it, leaves me a message. I check it later... thank God I tested negative.
im naked on webcam to her boyfriend, but im playing neopets at the same time, so its all evened out
woke up to an overdrawn credit card. did you order the dawsons creek boxset last night?
i hope so.
Just saw two girls doing a walk of shame together. Slut bonding at it's best.
I'm such a good drunk match marker. You single, you single... Drunk friend meet single boy. BOOM illegitimate baby made!
The last thing I remember was naked hot tub and taking a shot and using the hot tub water as a chaser. Not acceptable.
CALL 911 HAND IS STUCK IN THE GARBAGE DISPOSAL. HELP
Do we still have any pizza left from last night?
So I just bought e from my sophomore home ec teacher. How's your weekend going?
I was sleeping pretty good until your cat pooped loudly. I dreamed that a full grown man was pooping on my ear. It startled me.
I told myself I'd stop after three shots of fireball. Haha HA hA.
He kept saying I needed to go to the hospital and it just made me want to call him a pussy so I went to bed
At least your nickname is not Plunge Slut and that nickname is not in a published thesis work
I am now banned from the bar... Because you got head from my ex in the woman's restroom
because he's a firefighter, wouldn't sleeping with him be like saying thank you to the community?
No one can touch me, I'm made of fruit.
Randomize
