You just made me feel so damn special
The whole way homeyou were flapping your arms up and down, and when I asked why you said you were trying to tell Tony Danza about the angels.
Well I tried to steal a golf cart. I fought with the Chick-Fil-A cow. And other things.
I have hooked up with someone in EVERYONE OF MY CLASSES.
That's how you know you deserve to be a senior
He called my vagina a rainforest. This is coming from a guy whose pubes are longer than his dick.
Omg just remembered. I tried to kidnap a dog.
I just want to steal his innocence through his penis. I really do.
I'm just walking around Lowe's groping the carpets....
I was told my cock was a religious experience.
It was like the devil him self busted his red hot satanic nuts all over my face and burned my eyes out of my innocent sockets.
We've given up. My vagina is tired of constant lonely nights and disappointments. This is our retirement.
I just put on my phone calendar to remind me of my final child support payment in 2029
Realizing life ain't all about burritos and strippers, it's a struggle out there, and it ain't looking pretty so far,..
I'll give you another blowjob if you bring me some cake.
I STUDIED GEOGRAPHY I KNOW THIS SHIT!! DON'T YOU DARE QUESTION MY AUTHORITY ON GLACIAL DEPOSITION AGAIN BITCH!!
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