How do i ask the guy i made out with for 4 hours if he is gay? He keeps telling me i'm so adorable and that he had a ''blasty''
it was like playing where's waldo with your underwear
Hypothetical question: If I threw up in the dishwasher do I clean it up or just turn it on? :(
I just found blacked-out interviews on my voice recorder. Go journalism.
Just realized how many men I've had sex with for the first time in St. Patty's Day past. Currently sending "HAPPY SEXIVERSARY" texts...
I just walked past a woman in the bar stroking a mans crotch, yelling 'I made this. I made this happen.'
I figured out plans for New Year's and by figuring out I mean I've got a sugar bowl of cocaine. Start at 10?
Get this. He's a red head and he works at country oven bakery. He will forever be known as the gingerbread man.
Look at all the pictures I have of us sucking on jello syringes.
if youre gonna throw up it might as well taste like christmas :S
I gave him head while despicable me 2 played in the background. I think I disappointed the minions
Willing booties have sort of a tractor beam for me.
My aunt just dropped me off at the bar, handed me $50 and told me she'd pick me up later if I needed her to. I should've gotten my license suspended a long ass time ago lol
So I got offered a job this morning based on being a "good role model for girls" and I am drunk at 330 in the afternoon in "celebration." sometimes, life is insane. But not so bad.
aloe plants are like gummy bears with an exoskeleton, but with healing powers instead of deliciousness.
are you on the drugs???
Randomize