Heard it's your birthday. I can't send pictures, but go ahead and imagine my balls.
HE had a tribal tattoo tramp stamp, jasmine.
Apparently faking a threesome isn't as much fun as you'd think
It's one of the reasons i'm here, along with emotional support, physical support if you need it, and power orgasms.
All I saw was a beagle come across the screen and explain the theory of relativity to me and leave
i was super drunk. to the point where i was putting shredded cheese on a fork, putting hot sauce on it then dipping it in salsa. it was awesome.
They asked if I was about to puke and my response was to laugh and suddenly throw up. Continuing my asshole streak I kept laughing while still vomiting.
Our logic class started an hour ago, I walked out and found my sister drunk, sitting down, eating m&ms, afraid to walk in... I want her life
We smoked a bowl, ate popcorn, and watched her lava lamp for an hour. it was a quality bonding experience
You put your name in his phone but not your number then screamed "Open the door!" and jumped out of the car
OMG -- There are strippers in the bathroom crying because their power moves aren't good enough to win the competition
This dude has batman tighty whities on over his cargo pants and he has the nerve to yell "fuck you bitch" up at my window.
You have got to be the only man who has passed out while getting a lap dance.
Success! We fucked roommates!
Does having sex in an airport bathroom with a girl you just met at the bar count as the mile high club? ...no?
Randomize
