Marg and I just meaowed the nat anthem. I was tenor.
'm tripping baaaaaaaaaaaaaaas
I stuck it in and pulled it out
Did she like it?
She giggled?
She liked it
oh vodka. i could write you a sonnet.
I just made $100 from people paying me not to get naked at the party... I need those P90X dvds
He promised he'd be the first bidder on my ebay item if i went home with him. Worth it.
You were pretty dunk by the time you introduced the vase as your best friend.
Yeah got a self inflicted broken nose.
Im tired as fuck but i cant leave him here like this i gave him the acid and i feel the responsibillity to put his mind back together its fun im an architect about to about to construct a whole new belief and moral system inside this soul. Talk about the best psychothearpy
You kept showing the cop the bruises on the bottoms of your feet and claiming you were a medical mystery.
I have whiskey and jager. There's no telling what kind of monster will emerge
Some guy just rode an office chair down my street, I hope he comes back so I can give him my number.
They should make a traveling bouncer service to remove unwanted people from your house without getting the cops involved. That sums up my Friday.
Is it wrong i wouldn't sleep with him because his boxers said #1 dad all over them?
Drunk is not a location!
The wedding is over. Operation sleep with my step-sister has officially begun
Randomize
