Anyone who says sunshine brings happyness has never woken up with the worst hangover of their life to their window being open and it being a bright shinny day
Gross thing of the day...i got cum in my new boots
the three of them together have enough kids to fill a barney live audience.
she gave him a mild concussion from throwing him against the wall in an attempt to dance with him. gotta love monday nights at the sandbar.
Do you understand how much easier life would be if fannypacks were normal
You are the sheppard guiding my vagina away from horrible decisions.
she insisted that i refer to her boobs by name.
saw a man tazing a raccoon in the middle of the street last night... normal
I got shot at today. If that doesn't get me at least a blow job I give up working on the south side
Slept in my car last night. It snowed. I peed on the street. �Hello 29...
She's popping painkillers like they're tic tacs and singing the soundtrack to dreamgirls. It's you're turn to babysit her.
Ahahhahaha I'm not that stupid but then again I thought cabo was in Africa until yesterday
I wouldn't be surprised. You and I have basically synced up our brain chemistry by doing drugs together in the same way that two girls would sync their menstrual cycles by sharing a house.
Acid king. Jackson puked a lot. Promoter booth. Angry security. No acid. Probably a good thing.
Let's say we can see the evolution of our "relation" by his name in my phone. Pizza slice emoticone. Pizza guy. Jordan. Jo. Jackhammer Pizza Guy. Jockhammer pizza guy.
Randomize
