you dont know how to answer ppls txts anymore?!?
im sorry, i don't get text messages.
He wanted me to blow him while he was playing guitar hero. there will not be a second date
i have a dinosaur tramp stamp
My student's should feel privledged to see me tuesday after the amount of alcohol I consumed this weekend.
there was this guy running across campus barefoot in the pouring rain stepping in all the puddles. i want his life. and i want to be stripper.
I just had a 30 minute conversation about hummingbirds. That high.
I miss high conversations.
Swinging. Is. Amazing.
Oh my fucking god I saw the pictures. What the mother fucking fuck. Destroy the pictures. Destroy the fucking pictures.
Please confirm the destruction of the pictures. NOW.
I think a van full of parolees just blew me kisses. Thoughts?
The forecast for tonight is alcohol and low expectations.
You're the only meteorologist I listen to.
dont eat that thats our sex nutella.
Yeah we invited her back for chicken nugget sandwiches
I can already feel the hangover I'll be having on New Year's Day. I don't know if I'm prepared for this.
How far are you from my house? Do I have time to masturbate before you get here?
maybe you should have closed the porn before you gave the professor your computer to hook up to the projector?
My brain is like a TV with 10 channels, 9 of them are static and the other one just plays that one Nagito Komaeda edit on loop 24/7
Randomize
