You just compared our sex life to a seven year old kid.
I wonder why dictionaries dont have indexes to help find the words easier.
You're just mad at the fact that I want to be a car alarm.
I called her new haircut "lesbian progressive" and now she's upset
Yeah like 200 white people came and they are playing that one Biggie Smalls song everyone knows.
Let's not fuck on an air mattress tonight...I'd rather get rug burn.
My mom opened up my bank statement today....my first alcohol intervention class is at 7:30am tomorrow.
I'll have party bus drop you off in the morning.
NO I WOULD NOT GET A GUMMER FROM A GRANDMOTHER
Remember that girl that we found passed out in the dorm study room under a pile of money and jimmy johns wrappers? She's standing right on front of me.
All I've done is masturbate and drink while being home from college.
I just got a robo call from the Addiction Help Line. Not sure how to take that.
hurry there's a jack Daniels slip n slide and clothes are coming off faster than I can even comprehend oh thank god for autocorrect
I'm seriously scared right now. Woke up next to 3 geese and a lot of feathers ..
I'm cuddly bitch. Deal with it.
It's 3 am. Nothing I've tried can get the taste of failure and vomit out of my mouth.
Randomize
