dunno bout you, but i grow tired of beef curtains
we were dressed as cave people and he kept telling everybody i was so easy a caveman could do it.
he peed everywhere. it's like having a puppy.
its preseason football. its like non alcoholic beer. who gives a fuck
just a question.. totally understand if you dont know what im talking about.. but.. do you have my funnel? i think i tucked it in to your bed last night.
Yikes. I usually have a 24-hour waiting period between sex partners. You know, like for a handgun.
Yes, but it's not new to me. It's like every time a new guy finds out I'm a squirter it's a novelty so they make me squirt and squirt and squirt until their bed is completely soaked. And then afterwards they complain that there isn't a dry bit to sleep on. No shit Sherlock.
Its not college unless your study breaks were to go throw up from blacking out the night before
He kept checkin to make sure you were still alive after you passed out on his bed, After like the 4th time he walked back in there you were naked on his bed eating an apple, claiming he needed to be the Adam to your Eve..That drunk..
I reek of vagina.. My cab driver commented.
I don't think I'm gonna survive today. I don't remember how to walk. I must crawl 6 blocks to my bed.
I guess I just don't understand how the two main issues with your ex involve a cock ring and a Christmas tree
she's a drunken disney princess. so basically me if i had a crown and no desire for independence.
Drunk is not a location!
How early is too early to start day drinking? Asking for a friend
About five minutes ago. You’re good now.
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